Life was a bit too much at this point. I mean, we’ve all been there; a break up, stress at work, a financial crisis. All these things left me in a state I was not used to. I’m generally a person who, I like to say, “Errors on the side of happiness.” I’ve had bad stuff happen before but I was always so resilient. This time it was a lot harder to get out of this depressed state in which I found myself. Something had to happen. It was either therapy or an adventure and since I have yet to find the therapist of my dreams in Bangkok; I decided immediately to get away. I couldn’t afford it but it wasn’t a matter of that, I really needed a mental health break, so I decided on good ol Bali and Nusa Lembongan. 

I had been there the year before with my ex and two incredible friends, Jack and Simone. I rarely like to go back and revisit places I’ve been to before when a new adventure awaits, but I opted, for what I knew, for two reasons. One, Jack was nice enough to offer me a free room in his Villa, which made a lot of sense to me. Two, I honestly didn’t have it in me to plan anything. This was a worry. I wanted something easy, that I understood, and something with no surprises. And of course, Indonesia never lets one down. There was one more very important reason I opted for this destination; Mola Molas! I was alerted to these strange creatures the year before and then was robbed of a chance to see them. Being very nearly endangered they are quite rare to see but I thought I’d try my luck and hunt down an elusive Mola Mola. I liked the idea of giving the trip a purpose.

The first few nights in Bali were a party. If you ever find yourself in Seminyak, treat yourself to one night at BaliJoes. It’s such a trip. It was really wonderful hanging out with Jack again, sadly Simone couldn’t make it, and even staying in the Villa, cooking Indonesian dinners, was as healing as it can get. I was starting to feel like myself again, although that’s easy surrounded by friends and good food. Upon getting onto Nusa Lembongan, I started to feel like my old old self again. Being by myself and left to my own thoughts, all the stress started to come back, so I decided to treat myself to one of my favourite pastimes; motorcycling around an island, with no destination in mind, just seeing what happens. Usually what happens is I get lost and I get heat stroke, but it’s still worth it. Try it. It cures all. I was able to enjoy my first night and get to bed early so I was ready to dive the next day. I went back to the Dive Center where I dove the last time I was there; Siren Diving.

I came across Siren in a kind of roundabout way; from a diving forum I was on. I hate these forums, as it’s mostly men patting each other on the back whilst discussing their Sheerwaters, however, occasionally you get a bit of usable information. A year ago I messaged the group asking if anyone knew a good place on Nusa Penida to dive with Manta Ray. After about twelve of the members informed me that I was an idiot for one reason or another, I finally received a DM from a very nice man.

He told me I should dive at a place called Siren Diving on Nusa Lembongan, which was right next to Nusa Penida. I looked them up and as it turns out this man gave me the best advice I’ve ever received. Darren and Prashanti run an incredible Dive Center based on joy, community, and dad jokes.

The next morning I was up and back in the familiar embrace of these two legends; Darren and Prashanti. The first day of diving was going to be at a couple sites I had gone to the year before and were absolutely gorgeous and also Mola spotting spots. I could not wait to get there.

Okay let me pause for a second here to explain what a Drift Dive is. Unlike the dive spots I was used to, where you have to plan to work with the current or avoid it altogether. These dive spots were a full embrace and shall we say celebration of current. The boat drops you at one spot, you allow yourself to be taken away by the current and picked up an hour later maybe two kilometers away. Sounds fun right? I did not find it thus on this particular day. The year before I didn’t have much issue with the concept, however, this year Mother Nature kicked it up and kicked me in the balls.

I got into the water and was immediately swept away by one of the craziest currents I’ve ever felt. I was given one job, one bloody job, and that was to stay behind my Dive Master, and could I do it ? NO. I was all over the place, up down, ass over elbow, onto the reef, way too far away from the reef, hit a rock, damn near hit a turtle. Ugh. It was a lot and by the end of the dive there was no Mola Mola sighting and I was exhausted having burned through all my air trying to control myself in this death washing machine known as Lembongan current. I thought, “No worries just getting my feet wet here, the other dives will be better.” They were not. And here’s the thing. Everybody was so nice. They kept telling me I did well, and I’ll soon figure it out. They offered me a larger air tank so I could extend the length of my dives (shame).  I went back to my little shack that night very very defeated.

The next day was sort of the same, although I had a much bigger tank this time so at least I was in the water for a reasonable period. This day I had a new Dive Master, Wayan, who was very very good, and had a very talented eye for finding all the little things around the reef. Since I still had no idea how to control myself in this damn current, I was able to glance at each creature for 1.2 seconds before I was whisked away trying to figure out which direction was up. At the end of the day, again, no Mola and not much headway made at becoming the skilled diver I was trying to become. I found myself on the boat heading back to shore limply trying to convince Wayan that I was actually a somewhat capable diver. All evidence seen to the contrary. But I wasn’t going to let anything get me down this time because the next day was Manta Point and Mola or not; I was going to see these gorgeous creatures I met for the first time last year and  Prashanti was going to be my guide. Score!

We got to Manta Point, after another crazy stunning boat ride along the coast of Nusa Penida. Whoever invented this area of the world had a special penchant for drama and beauty. I mean, the sapphire blue waters churning around these Jurassic cliffs really is the stuff dreams are made of -dramatic slightly seasick dreams. The boat was full of all the people I had been diving with the days prior and it was a fun group. We chatted with anticipation at seeing the Manta as we all struggled to pull on our 7 mm wetsuits. Open water gets cold very quickly.

The first thing I noticed as I bankrolled into the water was that there were a lot of boats that day and the second thing I noticed was the water was freezing. I didn’t remember it being this cold. The dive wasn’t what I was expecting, as we only saw one Manta and that particular Manta had a rope hanging from one of its wings (tragic). The Manta no-show was most likely due to the number of tourists in the water, which I really can’t complain too loudly about as I was in fact a tourist in the water. We did, however, see a gorgeous Bamboo shark swimming around the bottom and that made me very happy as sharks were quite rare around here due to fishing. But I will admit after my last experience; I left disappointed. This is one hard fact about nature, you really can’t predict anything. My dive days were dwindling and I was starting to get nervous that I would not actually be able to see a Mola.

I pushed all those thoughts down as we sped off to the next site, Crystal Bay. I didn’t really remember much about this sight as the last time I was there it was a lovely dive but nothing surreal. I do remember Darren showing off his bodybuilding poses underwater during the safety stop though. Prashanti gave us a quick briefing about the site stating that we should manage our expectations about seeing a Mola as they are very rare, however, that this was one of the prime spots to see them.

I jumped in the water with Wayan as he was going to personally be taking me around the site. It was a beautiful sandy bay that hosted schools of Barracuda and all your classic reef fish. From the bay you could follow the reef to a very steep drop in stunning perfect waters. I noticed quite a few divers heading in the same direction as Wayan and I immediately began to get a sinking feeling that no Mola Mola would come near this many people (being the shy creatures that they are). Wayan, however, seemed determined to get us further along the reef. I was happy and comfortable floating along in these now warm waters, when I looked up and saw a cold current approaching. It’s hard to describe how it looks. It’s almost as if the water had become sparkly or littered with millions of diamond shards. It’s absolutely stunning but when the water turns from a balmy 28 degrees to a frigid 14 in half a second; it kind of takes your breath away.

Wayan stayed the course and the number of divers started to dwindle. It was then it happened. I saw Wayan spin quickly around to look at me but I had already seen her, a Mola Mola swimming towards us. I was looking up at her in the distance as she came closer following the freezing current. There were four other divers in the water and all of us braced ourselves with GoPros at the ready. I was shaking, either from the sheer joy or the cold or both. She awkwardly yet so beautifully swam towards us, before taking a hard right and swimming back out to sea. My moment with her was no more than 30 seconds, but in those 30 seconds I was changed!

There it was, my talisman, my sign, my vision, the ocean provided me with living proof that life was beautiful, and all of the gods were still with me. Just quickly, if you’ve read any of my other articles and thought my writings tended towards the more dramatic, HOLD MY BEER. I came on this expedition looking for this fish but more so I was looking for it to be alright -for life to be okay again – for happiness to be my “go to” again. I came to once again find awe with something and see the world through rose coloured glasses. Being in awe or being inspired, for me, is like an injection of pure joy into my soul, which allows troubles and stress to just wash away and not hold space in my life. And if there was ever a reason to believe that, there it was; an impossibly rare encounter with this fish; proving once again, as the world does, for those who so desperately want to believe it, that there is unbounded beauty and immeasurable reverence everywhere.

Life can bring you down but look up, look to the people around you, people who can guide you, like Prashanti, Darren, and Wayan, who come into your life to show you your path. Gurus are everywhere. Signs and signals are everywhere and you will no doubt find a reason to believe in wonder again. I stared out at the blue for a second before turning to Wayan, eyes bright.

We fist bumped each other, I let out a little scream and BOOM -down current – big one. By this time, I was getting used to it but this was definitely larger than the previous ones. I looked at Wayan who was signaling me to grab onto a rock. He did not have to tell me twice. We waited there for a while assuming the current would subside, but when it didn’t, Wayan decided to make a move. We essentially had to rock climb up the cliff to get back to the bay. He was bringing me to a little shelter in the rocks where we could rest for a second and let the current blow over our heads. The problem was the last three meters towards the crevice of safety, let’s call it, was all soft coral and anemones, or more specifically nothing to grab onto. Wayan was already safely in the crevice, so I gave one last push off, kicked with all my might and for one second I was sure I wasn’t going to make it over. I was exhausted. Wayan grabbed my hand and pulled me the rest of the way in. We rested. No shock, I was getting low on air so we comfortably made our way back to the bay and our spot for the safety stop.

The dive was short but I had accomplished everything I had set out to do. On the top, I was all smiles and screams as Wayan and I paddled back recounting with much enthusiasm the last 30 minutes. Here’s the moral. Were you waiting for the moral ? Okay sometimes it takes me a while but I do get there. Drift Diving is life. You can dive in, fight, kick, claw at rocks, and desperately try to maintain some sort of control over what’s happening to you. This doesn’t work. Believe me on the diving and the life thing. Life, much like the ocean’s current, will keep moving how it wants no matter what and guess what; it’s stronger than you. You will become exhausted, humbled, and angry, and probably prematurely aged, just saying. However, if you dive in and let go things happen. There’s freedom in releasing and letting the current take you where it will. Breath slowly, relax, open your eyes and take it all in. The reef-like life can be so incredibly wonderful if you’re not trying to cling to where you are. Good and bad will happen and you don’t even have to do much but stay close to those who help and guide you

Here’s the other moral. No matter what, there’s always a scary down current, life is like that, but the entire world, the universe is working to inspire and change you for the better. Of course chasing endangered species to 30 m is not always the way to remember that but there is so much abundance available to you so there is always a reason for awe. Forces pull you in all sorts of directions but keep your eyes forward, endure the cold, keep looking up, follow your DM, and something will be there, waiting to show you how absolutely wonderful things can be!

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Neo hippie, yoga non- guru, and man of mystery. Avid traveller but only recently started writing about it. Yoga enthusiast, activist, and teacher in Bangkok. Loving father of four fur babies.

More Travel Stories from Mark

• North Korea Trip
• Afghanistan Trip
• Uzbekistan Trip
• The Omo Valley Ethiopia
• Volunteer Reef Cleanup for SEVENSEAS Media at Koh Tao Thailand

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